Understanding Young People: A Journey Through the Six Stages Framework with SX
- Dr Shungu Hilda M’gadzah
- 17 minutes ago
- 7 min read
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1. Introduction: The Power of Perspective
Imagine being a 14-year-old whose world was turned upside down by a significant medical event that left lasting effects on his concentration, memory, and emotional regulation. This is the reality for SX, an articulate and creative teenager who is often misunderstood by the very systems meant to support him. He has a passion for hands-on activities and a sharp mind, but his struggles with focus and emotional reactivity are frequently misinterpreted.
The central idea we will explore is that how we perceive someone's struggles directly determines how we respond to them. Our mindset can be the difference between isolating a person and empowering them. This document introduces the Six Stages Framework, a powerful tool for understanding these different perspectives and learning to see the child behind the behaviour. Using SX's real-world journey as our guide, we will see how each stage can radically change the support a young person receives.
To truly understand this framework, we first need to understand the person at its heart—a young man navigating a world that doesn't always see him clearly.
2. Meet SX: The Story Behind the Behaviour
To apply the framework with empathy, we must first get to know the individual. SX is not a collection of behaviours, but a complex young person with unique strengths and significant challenges.
Background: A 14-year-old whose education was profoundly disrupted by a medical incident in his early adolescence. This event impacted his cognitive abilities, emotional regulation, and stamina for learning.
Strengths & Interests: He is passionate about physical activities like parkour and boxing. He is also a skilled YouTube editor and an articulate conversationalist, motivated by practical, hands-on learning.
Challenges: In school, SX struggles with attention—lasting 5 minutes in large classes, and up to 20 minutes in a small, quiet setting. He’ll often leave the room when overwhelmed, a strategy sometimes seen as defiance. He also struggles with impulsivity, emotional reactivity, and sensory sensitivities.
Current Situation: He attends a part-time alternative provision for just a few hours a day while his parent advocates for more support. The diagnostic process is slow, and ADHD is being explored through the Right to Choose pathway.
With this deeper appreciation of SX’s situation, we can now turn to the framework that helps us map and understand the different ways he is perceived.
3. The Six Stages Framework: A Map of Mindsets
The Six Stages Framework is a continuum of mindsets and responses, ranging from negative, dismissive reactions that harm, to positive, proactive actions that heal and create systemic change. It provides a map for charting our own perspectives and those of the systems around us.
This framework helps professionals, parents, and educators:
...make sense of complexity, challenge bias, and build bridges of empathy.
Let’s now walk through each stage, seeing how these different mindsets have directly shaped SX's experience, for better and for worse.
4. SX's Journey Through the Six Stages
Stage -3: Dismissive & Defensive
"He's making bad choices."
SX's Experience: At this stage, staff or peers label SX's actions as "lazy," "aggressive," or "attention-seeking" without looking for the underlying reasons for his behaviour.
The Impact: This mindset assigns blame to SX, eroding his self-worth and creating a cycle of mistrust. It prevents any real support from being offered because the problem is seen as a character flaw, not an unmet need.
The Opportunity: To challenge these assumptions and introduce trauma-informed training.
Stage -2: Minimising & Avoidant
"He just needs to try harder."
SX's Experience: The focus is placed on metrics like attendance or exam results, ignoring the root causes of his struggles. For instance, when he didn't attend his recent mocks, the concern was on the absence itself, not the cognitive fatigue or anxiety that led to it.
The Impact: This approach adds immense pressure on SX without providing him with the tools to succeed. It invalidates his very real neurological and emotional struggles, making him feel like a failure for not being able to simply "try harder."
The Opportunity: To build a deeper understanding of his neurocognitive profile following his medical event.
Stage -1: Curious but Cautious
"Something’s going on, but I don’t know what."
SX's Experience: Staff notice that SX performs much better in quiet, one-to-one settings but are unsure how to replicate that success in other environments or what it truly signifies about his needs.
The Impact: While this is a step away from blame, it leads to inconsistent support. SX experiences pockets of success but is left vulnerable in situations where staff lack the confidence or knowledge to help him manage.
The Opportunity: To provide case formulation supervision to connect the dots and co-create a consistent support plan.
Stage 0: Passive Awareness
"We’ve got a plan in place."
SX's Experience: The official process for an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP) has begun, and he attends a part-time provision for just 1.5 hours per day. However, there is no structured therapy or targeted intervention happening.
The Impact: This stage looks like progress on paper but results in stagnation for SX. The system is compliant but not actively engaged in his recovery, leaving him in a holding pattern without the deep support he needs.
The Opportunity: To move from passive compliance to active care by truly listening to SX and his family.
Stage +1: Active Empathy
"He’s doing his best with what he has."
SX's Experience: Key workers start to build relational safety with SX. They notice his sensory triggers, offer him breaks or an exit when he's overwhelmed, and begin to see his behaviour as a form of communication.
The Impact: For the first time, SX feels seen and understood. This relational safety becomes the foundation for trust, engagement, and learning. It reduces his need for protective, reactive behaviours.
The Opportunity: To expand this empathetic practice to all staff, ensuring consistency across his entire day.
Stage +2: Inclusive Allyship
"How can we adapt the system to meet his needs?"
SX's Experience: Practitioners move beyond managing his struggles and begin adapting the environment. They might co-create a self-regulation toolkit with him or champion his interests, such as his dream of running an outdoor survival school. This stands in stark contrast to moments when he’s told he can’t join certain activities "for his safety."
The Impact: SX becomes a partner in his own support. This builds his agency and self-advocacy skills, empowering him to understand and articulate his needs. The focus shifts from fixing him to fixing the environment around him.
The Opportunity: To fully involve SX in setting his own goals and exploring alternative curricula that align with his passions.
Stage +3: Systemic Change Agent
"This case shows where the system fails children with hidden injuries."
SX's Experience: Professionals use the lessons from SX's journey to advocate for broader changes. They push for better, more integrated education, health, and therapeutic pathways for all students with similar needs.
The Impact: The positive changes extend far beyond SX. His story becomes a catalyst for creating trauma-informed policies and practices that will help countless other students avoid the struggles he faced.
The Opportunity: To create cross-sector, trauma-informed policies that become standard practice, not just individualised plans.
Having journeyed through each stage one by one, we can now see how they fit together as a complete continuum of understanding.
5. The Framework at a Glance: From Dismissal to Advocacy
This table synthesizes SX's journey through the Six Stages, providing a clear overview of the shift from negative judgment to proactive, systemic support.
Stage | Mindset | Example from SX’s Case | Opportunity to Shift |
-3: Dismissive & Defensive | "He’s making bad choices." | Staff or peers labelling SX as "lazy", “aggressive”, or “just attention-seeking”. | Challenge assumptions, introduce trauma-informed training. |
-2: Minimising & Avoidant | "He just needs to try harder." | Focus on attendance (e.g., missing mocks) without addressing cognitive fatigue or sensory needs. | Build understanding of neurocognitive profiles post-injury. |
-1: Curious but Cautious | "Something’s going on, but I don’t know what." | Staff noticing SX does better one-to-one, but unsure how to replicate this. | Provide case formulation supervision and co-create support plans. |
0: Passive Awareness | "We’ve got a plan in place." | EHCP process started, but provision is just 1.5 hours a day with no structured therapy. | Move from compliance to active care by listening to SX and family voice. |
+1: Active Empathy | "He’s doing his best with what he has." | Key workers noticing sensory triggers, offering exits, and building relational safety. | Expand training for all staff and ensure consistent practice across the setting. |
+2: Inclusive Allyship | "How can we adapt the system to meet his needs?" | Practitioners adjusting lesson structure and co-creating self-regulation toolkits with SX. | Involve SX in goal-setting and explore alternative curricula pathways. |
+3: Systemic Change Agent | "This case shows where the system fails children..." | Professionals using SX’s case to advocate for joined-up education, health, and therapeutic pathways. | Create cross-sector trauma-informed policies, not just individual plans. |
6. Conclusion: What This Means for You
SX's story is a powerful reminder that behaviour is often a form of communication—a signal about an unmet need, an underlying vulnerability, or a response to a world that feels overwhelming. SX reminds us that the road from trauma to learning is never linear. It takes courage to leave the cave of assumptions and walk with a child who is still learning to trust themselves and the world around them.
Too often, systems fail children with invisible or intersecting needs. As a professional, you are in a position to challenge this. This framework asks you to consider if your current practices are treating symptoms or investing in sustained support. For a teacher, mentor, therapist, or social worker, your perspective is incredibly powerful. Your belief in a young person can be:
...the bridge between resistance and recovery.
As you reflect on this framework, consider these questions in your own work and learning:
What does this behaviour protect them from?
How can we scaffold not just learning, but hope?
Are we giving them what they need—or what’s convenient?
📘 Learn about the Six Stages Framework